when was the last time you went : DOH!!!

[largo]

This morning during a conference call with our clients we were showing them how the billing administrator would handle payment processing. The task is actually quite simple, however the options are extensive.

After I got to the final step I warned everyone not to run the batch as the system was in debug mode and it will run a failed request on every client in db. Having said that, I hit "Initiate Batch" on my browser and the system started processing transactions.... DOH!!!

When was the last time you went DOH!? :)

[cahva]

I work in webhosting company and one of our clients called today that hes having problem with his email. Ok, I asked the normal questions and all that. My first question is allways: "Is your net connection ok?". He aswered yes. I talked with him about 20 minutes and it got clear to me that their net was f*cked up. I told him to open the browser and write our url to it. Well, it didnt open and browser opened the error page.

I said:"What was my first question to you?"
client:"You asked is our net was working."
me:"And you said it was."
client:"Yeah."
me:"Well, it doesnt work. Call your internet provider"
client:"Ok."<hangs up>
me:"DOH!" :)

I learned a lesson. First ask client to open the %#%& browser! :)

[Elizabeth]

Oh I have so many of these "DOH!" moments, I couldn't possibly list them- so I'll do as the post says and give my last one (which was 2 days ago)...

I work from home a lot, but I do have an office where I go also. So a few days ago, I'm working on a client's website until midnight and then when I go to the office the next day there was one small change to my template that I needed to make. Unfortunately, I forgot the small task of ftp-ing the most current files back to my office computer, so I ended up changing the old files, then ftp-ing them (in essence over-writing hours of work) before I realized what an idiot I am :D

It's that whole "locking-your-car-keys-in-your-car-with-your-car-running" sort of pit-in-the-stomach feeling :D

Know it well!

-Elizabeth

[largo]

guys, thank you for making me feel SO much better! :)

[altexis]

I am Elizabeth's close friend as to the DOH! moments... but its not only the human making thrilling mistakes.

I remember some years ago... back at the Winblows95 days.
My computer run out of memory but I didn't know it! I was working on a very very big application when the computer started showing me all the crazy things you could imagine. I was too tired to realize that it could be the memory's fault, so I got so mad at the %$^#*& computer that I pressed the power button. I still don't know why I didn't trash it instead!! Result: many hours of lost work.

I also remember one of my first such moments... I was about 13 years old... at my first steps in programming an Amstrad CPC6128. Back at those years people programmed in Basic 1.1 ... building top-down programs and having to use line numbers infront of every line of code. No procedures, no functions, no classes, no exception handling techniques! Nigthmare days. So I remember I programmed for many hours when the power went off :-S How is that for a DOH! moment? After this I learned that is very wise to save your code every 5 minutes.

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by altexis
I So I remember I programmed for many hours when the power went off :-S How is that for a DOH! moment? After this I learned that is very wise to save your code every 5 minutes.
Yes, I think we can all relate to that, although now we do have battery backup on most our machines (except mine LOL)... now we have a common saying around the office-
"SAVE EARLY, SAVE OFTEN!"

Can I interject a non-programming "DOH!" moment?
Several years ago when I was young and single and hung out at the clubs, my friends and I (as most women do) would people-watch and make catty comments about other women there ("did you see what SHE was wearing?" and "Oh my gosh she should NOT have her hair like that"... you get the idea.) Anyway, so after a few drinks we decide we will go out and make dorks out of ourselves on the dance floor. But unfortunately as I went to step up to get on the elevated floor, my shoe caught on the stair and I literally fell face down on the floor. Everyone in the club completely stopped moving and stared at me. It was one of those "screech to a halt" surreal moments where you realize what a dork you really are LOL. Anyway I have now relinquished all rights to ever make fun of anyone else again :D

-Elizabeth

[altexis]

Originally posted by Elizabeth
Several years ago when I was ... single

you mean you are NOT single??? ohhh... thats a sad day for the PHPBuilder community :(


Originally posted by Elizabeth
But unfortunately as I went to step up to get on the elevated floor, my shoe caught on the stair and I literally fell face down on the floor. Everyone in the club completely stopped moving and stared at me.

I had one funny moment like this... but the interesting part is that when I just recovered from the sock and watching everyone staring at me... my mind instead of feeling bad, it realized a bug I made in a program I was writting!... Maybe human brains need a little shake up once in a while hehehe

[Weedpacket]

Originally posted by altexis
I also remember one of my first such moments... I was about 13 years old... at my first steps in programming an Amstrad CPC6128....
Gee, I remember doing this; I wrote an adventure game for the son of a friend; got pretty much to the end and someone down the road decided at that moment that their car would look much nicer wrapped around a power pole. The pole did not survive.

The difference between us is that I was on a CPC464 - it's a bit hard to get into a "save early, save often" mode when you've only got a cassette tape drive...


As for a more recent event... um... lessee ... okay: mail account administration.

We had email accounts for everyone in the office - as you do - and one of us was leaving on Friday. Naturally, there were a number of people who would email her in the course of business, and it would not look good if they suddenly started bouncing, so I figured that - instead of simply disabling her email account - I would alias it to the internal all-points office mailing list, so that someone else could pick up the ball. A quick, simple change that I made in less than a minute before heading off to the pub for the farewell party.

I didn't remove her address from the internal all-points office mailing list.

Someone mailed her later that night.

.... No, sorry. I can't talk about it anymore.

[jayant]

This happened w/ me day before yesterday:-
I was standing in a bus waiting for the stop to come. When the bus got near to the stop, I started to approach the gate of the bus to get down. I realised someone is holding or puuling my bag.
I turned around and saw:
There was this beautiful gal whose nice long hair had caught up with the zipper of the bag and it was paining her a lot. Though I immediate stepped back and got them out of it, everyone seemed to be looking at me, I said sorry and the bus stopped at the stop. Time for me to get down.
What was more embarrasing was that this was the second incident in the bus with me. The first one: When I was trying to get into the bus, my foot slipped.
:(

[LukeO]

Lol, dont even remind me.... so many DOH! moments. The last one would have to be the story of my server :).

Out host had been down for a couple of days, due to some server-related problem. Clients were emailing/calling me every 5 minutes. Finally the host gave us an update through the forum, and on quick inspection I thought I saw:

-------BLUR------- All data has been lost EXCEPT server BCHICAGO -------BLUR-------

which was the server I was on, but alas, the message was actually (on a 2nd and 3rd re-read... what? i was tired!!!)

All data has been lost on the server BCHICAGO

No backups (stored on the same server!!) meant that several clients had lost ALL of their websites, some of which they never kept backups of themselves. The torrent of abuse and hardship I then faced has to be censored from this forum.

Luke

[largo]

Luke: I can only imagine what that must have been like. Hey, if nothing else, you came out a much stronger person yes? :)

System admins are such abused souls.

BTW: After reading weedpacket's doh story, I finally understand his nick :D

[Weedpacket]

Originally posted by largo
BTW: After reading weedpacket's doh story, I finally understand his nick :D

By Jove, he got it!

It happened a fair while ago now, but nothing since (at least in this arena) has really compared well enough to qualify as a "DOH!" moment ... maybe it immunised me against stuffing up. Or at least worrying about stuffing up.

Like that fellow Nietzsche said: "That which does not kill us makes us stranger". Hey, dalescop, maybe I should make that my .sig?

[Weedpacket]

Originally posted by Elizabeth
Know [that feeling] well!

SCENE 12. Int. Office. Day.

ELIZABETH is sitting at her computer preparing to upload some files. She has them selected and hits the ftp client's "SEND" button (CU of screen as this happens). A progress bar appears. A minute or two passes as the progress bar approaches completion track. Cut to side CU of ELIZABETH as she starts to frown and looks more closely at the screen. Cut to ECU of file timestamp information on left side of ftp client (those being uploaded), then med. quick pan to file timestamp information on right (those at home being overwritten). Another quick pan left and right to compare the two sets of numbers again.

Cut to screen's POV of ELIZABETH as she takes on a stunned mullet expression. SFX of nasty dramatic chord with lots of strings as the camera's focal settings are messed around with so that our POV appears to zoom in towards ELIZABETH, while the rest of the room zooms dramatically off into the far distance.

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by LukeO
The torrent of abuse and hardship I then faced has to be censored from this forum.
OH MY GAWD that sucks Luke! But don't worry, we still love you here! :)

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by Weedpacket


SCENE 12. Int. Office. Day.

...etc etc...
Weedpacket I had no idea you were such a talented playwright!

..scene follows with Elizabeth pulling hair and screaming ""NO! The humanity!!"

Actually it was more like, "OH SH*T..."
:D

-Elizabeth

[jazz]

Just this morning Largo :D

Had two hours looking at a hunk of vb code without working out why l was getting an error message...

Code started


Private Sub Form_load()
'
On Error Goto LoadError
'
yadda yadda yadda
'
LoadError:
MsgBox err.number & " : " err.message

End Sub


After two hours some one else had a look and suggested l exit the sub before getting to the LoadError statement and issueing an error message each time it ran...


D'uh :(

[BuzzLY]

I was 12 years old, and helping my uncle work on the sewage lines at my grandmother's house. We had a deep hole dug, and the clay pipes were wide open. I told him I had to use the bathroom pretty bad, and he said "Ok, just don't flush." Let's just say this was a "job" that required me to sit down. When I was done, I instinctively reached for the handle. As soon as I depressed it, I realized what I did, and yelled out the window to my uncle "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Look out!"

Fortunately, he heard me and was able to jump out of the hole in time.

D'OH!!!!

Ok, so it has nothing to do with PHP, but I just had to share. Aren't you glad I did?

Liz, don't feel bad... I am a Lotus Notes programmer; one of the things we do is replicate databases to keep them all up to date. One day after making a bunch of code changes, I replicated my changes to the production server. But I replicated the wrong database; I ended up sending a year-old database into production! Needless to say the IT Support person got a lot of nasty calls and emails. I told her I would look into it, and immediately replicated the correct database. Fortunately, no data was lost, so I didn't tell anyone what a bonehead I was. I just told them that Lotus Notes is really buggy and that I would look into what happened. For some reason, I was never able to "find out what happened..."

D'OH!!!

[largo]

jazz, that's very much a doh! :) Happens to the best of us though.

Also, BuzzLY, I do not believe you. This is what really happened folks (weedpacket syndrome kickin in...)

--
BuzzLY had planned a trip to the mall with his friends last week, he was looking forward it. April and her friends had promised to show up, and BuzzLY was especially looking forward to that.

As he knelt in the mud, baking in the heat, he could feel nothing but rage... "I'll show you ... mister.don't flush... I'll...

--
Sorry BuzzLY :)

back to work!

[Elizabeth]

BuzzLY!
We're so glad you're back :) and so glad you've brought the level of the conversation down as low as it could possibly go LOL :D

(Talk about a LOAD ERROR statement... or perhaps it was a CORE DUMP)

-Elizabeth

[BuzzLY]

largo, thanks for blowing my cover. And for the record, I was not 12 last week. That was well over... well, let's just say it was a little longer than a week ago ;)

Thanks, Liz... I'm glad I could come back and bring the level of conversation down to where it belongs :D And I think it was more of a MEMORY FLUSH than anything :p

[dalecosp]

Originally posted by Weedpacket
Like that fellow Nietzsche said: "That which does not kill us makes us stranger". Hey, dalecosp, maybe I should make that my .sig?

I thought he said, "stronger," but it is, as they used to say, a "Mad, mad, mad, mad, world..."

Your .sig can be whatever you want, of course....

[dalecosp]

Hmm, a D'OH.....

Dunno if this is the most recent, but it's one that still burns a bit....

I've been hoarding parts since August to build my wife a new computer, a drive here, a chip there, as finances allow. So, last month I finally got the MOBO and CPU. Now, I've never been in the habit of checking the power supply with a multimeter before hooking the dang thing up....

D'OH, the smell of hot metal and silicone....

Anyway, I'm saving up for another mobo and Athlon XP 2000+. I already bought another $#*$&% power supply, and new leads for the multitester....

And then there was this conversation with a client the other day. It's a uniform company---one of the partners is kinda my "interface" gal, she tells me want they want on the site, I put it there. Well, we're developing a database/cart catalog for the site (the last guy had done static pages and form2mail.pl) and I went in to ask a couple of questions about product lines and SKU numbers. This gal wasn't there, so the other partner comes to see what's going on. I pull up the development site and click on a jacket, start blabbing about functionality, the complexity of a shopping cart with multiple variables (not just quantity, but size, color, etc.) and he just keeps staring at the screen. Finally he gets up enough courage and says, "I don't understand." (lights go off in my mind....) I say, sweetly, "OK, you don't understand what?" (or something equally stupid) and he says, "well, the (name of product I clicked on) is pants, not a jacket....."

The "jacket" photo had been displayed for this product on the real site for over 6 months.... D'OH!

[LukeO]

Lol, thats a bad one, I've been there before :).

[Elizabeth]

Have you ever dumped an entire pasta frozen dinner down the front of you during lunch?

Umm... did that one today. Gee I'm smooth. :D

-Elizabeth

[dalecosp]

Well, hmm, sorry to hear of your misfortune; as to the other ?, sorta....but I may have one even better.

A long time ago, in a galaxy not too awfully far away (the 80s, I think it was called), someone I know was a music teacher. One day he got a little enthusiastic in some conducting, or demonstrating, or somesuch, and did some type of spread-legged lunge which resulted in a breach of the entire crotch seam of his dress trousers...fortunately, this was at the end of the class period, so he dismissed the students rather quickly.

He ;) taught the last hour of the day in a choir robe.

Since that time I've tried to keep extra clothing around, handy, at most job locations...

[PHPGuru_2700]

I have some very embarrassing "D'OH" moments :). I was trying to get the GD module in PHP working, all you have to do is set the module path and delete the ;. well i did that and it still didnt work, after 5 hours of working on this and screaming at my computer i went to bed, i got up in the morning and it was working! then i remembered id never restarted apache then day b4......

[dalecosp]

OK, at the risk of becoming the member who "D'OH's" the most:

I got home this evening and fired up the laptop (as a consultant, when I'm out, I don't get it unless I use the laptop, and I didn't even have time to lift the lid today) and there is an email from a client whose site went active about 30 days ago.

I had set up a web interface so their email (they are a home-based firm) couldn't be harvested. And her message to me?

Hey!!
Is there any way I can tell where this email came from like the phone #, city, state, etc., because this customer's name isn't on our contact list and it doesn't ring a bell with me. I don't know what company he is with.
Just wondering............ I guess if he really wants his stuff he'll
contact us by phone.

Turns out that the last page before "Send Mail Now!" didn't have $EMail in an <input> tag, and no one noticed in all the emails we tested prior to going live...

D'OH, the N-humanity, or, as Elizabeth said...

[Elizabeth]

Bumping an old thread, haha-
But had to confess another doh! moment- spilled an entire can of Diet Faygo all over myself and the carpet today. Luckily I was not yet at the computer, or that would have been exceptionally bad.

Or perhaps that would have precipitated the purchase of an upgrade by my dear employers... hmmm...

-Elizabeth

[BuzzLY]

Huh huh... she said "Faygo"

Huh Huh

[Bunkermaster]

ok do'h moment 2 weeks ago :

[scene setup]I arrive in a new customer site to replace a gentle moron who has been marked as unwanted by customer for being unable to benchmark an application for 3 weks (du'h)[bleh]

I arrive as the savior ridding my white horse [navy blue passat actually but you know...]

I take the RSTS scripts, make a few modifications and run. The server responds well and i publish results...

3 days later i get suspicious, i look at script, add a debug echo on the server response size and i notice the server always answers by an error message... I rebuild the scripts (5 days of hard work to find workaround for RSTS bugs) and rerun the test... I crashed the server. 3 times. I had said ok it runs smoothly and it is really a piece of junk (the application not the server)... I walk into the project manager's office and say "remember your project? u were supposed to go live in june? ain't gonna happen..." She looks at me and starts to cry... DO'H!!!








Huh huh... she said "Faygo"

[goldbug]

Originally posted by Elizabeth
Have you ever dumped an entire pasta frozen dinner down the front of you during lunch?

Umm... did that one today. Gee I'm smooth. :D

-Elizabeth

No, but I have dropped a whole pizza onto the floor, top-down.

[matt_4013]

OK, my latest D'OH moment. Set the scene. We have a large Australian Motor Vehicle Corporation, with retail sites all around Australia. I'm here developing a site for them that allows clients to come in, view all their vehicles records, from sales, servicing, etc. Really not that hard,. Anyway, we set it up, we go live, everything's good, we win a big servicing contract because of it, and everyone's happy. A week later is the General Manager's meeting. This is a financial planning meeting, so we have ALL of the General Managers from all around Australia, as well as the Joint Managing Directors, CFO, and all of the accountants. So, my dear friend the IT manager decides this is the perfect opportunity to get some extra funding for the IT detpartment. So, it's time for a presentation.

Get to the conference centre at 7:30, set up a demo server with some test data (there was no internet connection, not even a close enough phone line for dial-up (wtf!)), it's all working good. Plug my laptop into the projector, bang, it's all focussed, we're all happy. 2pm, it's time for my presentation. Get up in front of all these managers, start talking, explaining what it does, why it does and how it will help the business. They're all nodding, I've got the CFO sitting there saying "hmmm, the possibilities for this are enormous!". Now for the unveiling:

Me: "Now remember, this is live on the Internet at the moment, we have customers using this!"

Click

Here's D'OH number 1. My laptop fails to come out of standby mode. It just sits there, blank screen. It has NEVER done this before, it's a beautiful peace of machinery, and I keep it nice and clean for this reason. To the chorus of mild laughter and some sarcastic comments from the more cynical of the managers, I restart, and re-prepare for my unvieling.

Click click

Opera opens up, I go to the demo server, bling it all appears. Put in the username and password for the data of one of our bigger customers.

D'OH moment number 2. We have a header, a page body, and a page footer. Good stuff. Not so good. We also have a big red error message that says "Could not connect to database, please contact <blah>".

I concluded my presentation there, amidst quite a lot of amusement, sarcasm and general revelry, went and fixed the server (MySQL had crashed, god knows why), came back and redid my presentation, but D'OH! That was certainly embarrassing!

[Elizabeth]

<-- buying Matt & Bunker a beer. You guys beat my Faygo incident hands down! :D

Goldbug - did you eat it afterwards?

-Elizabeth

[matt_4013]

<-- buying Matt & Bunker a beer. You guys beat my Faygo incident hands down!

mmm, beer. Thanks Elizabeth!! Ever had a Coopers Ale? Australian beer is the best in the world.

Another D'OH incident 2 seconds ago ;) My boss came in and caught me posting on PHPBuilder instead of working :p

[Bunkermaster]

do'h moment... power outage... my APU saved my ass but i closed Word a bit fast... DAMN

[TheNookie]

Originally posted by matt_4013
Another D'OH incident 2 seconds ago ;) My boss came in and caught me posting on PHPBuilder instead of working :p

Dont worry, happens to me all the time.. :rolleyes:

(Not that my post count is so high... :\ )

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by matt_4013
mmm, beer. Thanks Elizabeth!! Ever had a Coopers Ale? Australian beer is the best in the world.

Another D'OH incident 2 seconds ago ;) My boss came in and caught me posting on PHPBuilder instead of working :p I'm partial to whatever beer is on sale or bought for me LOL.. no seriously, I like Killian's & Bud Light although I've been tempted to have a Foster's from time to time.

And at least he didn't catch you on hotbabes.com -- PHP Builder can at least sound professional, right? :D

-Elizabeth

[matt_4013]

PHPBuilder is a RESOURCE! ;) I use it for research :p Actually, it has answered a few of my questions, tho most of the ones I have now people can't seem to help :( All good.

Ugh, Fosters Beer. May as well be drinking Cat's piss ;) That's one of the exceptions. If you ever get a chance, try Coopers Pale Ale, or Coopers Draught, West End Draught, or Crown Lager. I'm not sure if crownies are Australian, but who cares? ;) *drooooooling*

Next time I'm in the US I'll bring you over some!!

[goldbug]

Originally posted by Elizabeth

...

Goldbug - did you eat it afterwards?

-Elizabeth

Actually, no. The dog beat me to it.

[piersk]

About an hour ago when I discovered that my exam, which I thought started at 2 for 2hrs actually started at 1 for 2hrs.

Now I have to wait for the Uni exam board to make a decision on whether I can keep the mark that I get. :(

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by piersk
About an hour ago when I discovered that my exam, which I thought started at 2 for 2hrs actually started at 1 for 2hrs.
OMG Piers, that totally sucks! :( <handing Piers a beer, too!>

I can relate- one of my senior papers in college was still printing about 15 minutes before my class started... the printer stopped printing, I grabbed it and ran, not even really looking at it. Sitting in class waiting to turn it in, I realized it had only printed about 2/3rds of my paper- the printer had run out of paper and stopped printing. Yes, I got a "D" in the class, as my prof was less than sympathetic. Oh well, I survived. :D

That "pit" feeling in the stomach is about the worst thing in the world! But someday you will look back and laugh...

-Elizabeth

[piersk]

*takes beer from Elizabeth and chugges it back in one*

Lizzie *duck* where do you get all this beer from?

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by piersk
Lizzie *duck* where do you get all this beer from? Ahem.. I believe we've had the "Lizzie" discussion before. (http://www.phpbuilder.com/board/showthread.php?s=&threadid=10235216&highlight=keeya) You were right to duck :D

... and as for the beer supply, I have my sources, but seeing as how they're confidential, if I told you, I'd have to kill you.

-Elizabeth

[BuzzLY]

On a totally unrelated note...

Zabby, your, uh, shipment has arrived. It took a little longer than expected, 'cuz I lost my baseball bat. Costs have doubled this time around, I'm afraid...

[Elizabeth]

Psst Buzz! Ix-nay on the Eer-bay!
<looking nervously from side to side>

...newbies.. :rolleyes:

[goldbug]

Eer-bay? Is that like Ear-bay? The World's Online Marketplace for Ears?

<rimshot />

Thanks, folks. I'll be here all week (sorry for you!).

[Elizabeth]

I had 2 d'oh! moments today-
1) I come in and I have an email from one of my e-commerce clients wondering why she hadn't received any orders in the past 10 business days. I investigate and see that there were 23 orders waiting to be filled & that it wasn't connecting to the database. Woops, sorry about that. :rolleyes:

2) I go to write a check and realize I don't have my driver's license, and as I'm frantically trying to figure out where it might be I realize that I had gone to Kinko's to make some copies the day before and had to make a copy of my driver's license and Social Security Card... and yep, you guessed it- I left them both on the glass of the copy machine. :rolleyes: Talk about identity theft- how about just handing it to someone?!

I'm blaming my oversight on the fact that I was flustered at the time because I had to pay for my 8 cent copy with a debit card as I had forgotten to bring any cash with me. :rolleyes:

I think I'm coming down with a case of HUA syndrome- anyone else familiar with this? :D

-Elizabeth

[goldbug]

whoa! did you get those back? if not, i'd go leave your birth certificate as well, for good measure.

[stolzyboy]

yeah i think a finger print would be good to

hey Elizabeth, you seem to be having a lot of d'oh moments lately
going thru some stressful times/bottles/pills/etc....

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by goldbug
whoa! did you get those back? if not, i'd go leave your birth certificate as well, for good measure. I called and they said they still had them there, so I'm on my way... I'm sure everyone's made fun of my picture by now LOL. Good idea about the birth certificate :D It's good to be thorough.

-Elizabeth

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by stolzyboy
yeah i think a finger print would be good toAh, but of course- the fingerprint. Good idea!
hey Elizabeth, you seem to be having a lot of d'oh moments lately
going thru some stressful times/bottles/pills/etc.... No, no drugs LOL - I think I just need a vacation. :rolleyes:

-Elizabeth

[Weedpacket]

Dealing with a Government Department one day (which shall remain nameless - partly because they change their name every twelve months or so) I got monumentally fed up with being told yet again to supply proof of ID.

I took the form back, signed it, grabbed a stapler off the poor bureaucrat's desk, fired a staple into my thumb and pressed it to the form.

"There: signature, thumbprint and DNA sample! Anything more you need?"

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by Weedpacket
"There: signature, thumbprint and DNA sample! Anything more you need?" Wow, weed, you really do go all the way when making a point, eh? :D

-Elizabeth

[stolzyboy]

ahhhh.......

i think weed is all talk, i would like weed to make a DNA file upload that will check it against a FBI database to make sure that staple was really the one that went through his little pinky

on a lighter note, in 3rd grade i tricked a kid into stapling his toungue to a piece of paper

[Moonglobe]

Originally posted by stolzyboy
on a lighter note, in 3rd grade i tricked a kid into stapling his toungue to a piece of paper

you are so cruel.

[Bunkermaster]

weed, there ARE nicer ways to make a DNA sample available (takes longer than a staple)

[piersk]

Originally posted by Bunkermaster
weed, there ARE nicer ways to make a DNA sample available (takes longer than a staple)

Mouth swabs?? :D

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by Bunkermaster
weed, there ARE nicer ways to make a DNA sample available (takes longer than a staple) OMG - LMAO. I think that might present several legal problems for weed, however.
In general, I believe that practice is frowned upon in public places. :)

-Elizabeth

[piersk]

*oozes innocense* What? Mouth swabs?

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by piersk
*oozes innocense* What? Mouth swabs? Ah, but of course Piers... that's way too provocative for the commoner. ;)

-Elizabeth

[Weedpacket]

Originally posted by stolzyboy
that staple was really the one that went through his little pinky
Um, (a) it was the thumb, (b) I took the staple away with me, and (c) the FBI has nothing on me.

[Mordecai]

Originally posted by piersk
*oozes innocense*
I think you're a little bit confused as to what happens during this method. ;)

[Elizabeth]

Eww. ok, wow this is getting WAY vivid. :D

-Elizabeth

[Moonglobe]

i've visited many a forum in my time online, but never in my life have i seen a topic go as off-course as this one! this is just pathetic really. don't you people have better things to do with your lives?

i know, stupid question;):rolleyes:

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by Moonglobe
don't you people have better things to do with your lives?Obviously not. :)

[Moonglobe]

Originally posted by Weedpacket
Um, (a) it was the thumb, (b) I took the staple away with me, and (c) the FBI has nothing on me.

o, but you see....they have "nothing" on no one. AHAAHAHAH -- *HACK**COUGH**HACK* /me falls to floor, dies of heart attack

Originally posted by Elizabeth
Obviously not. :)

Originally posted by Moonglobe
i know, stupid question;):rolleyes:

hm..............:D

[stolzyboy]

hey moonglobe, obviously you don't have anything better to do
either, or you wouldn't be raging us for posting on this thread,
when you are doing the same thing, LOL :)

[Moonglobe]

actually i DO have things i should be doing.....but im not doing them :rolleyes:
and besides, who would ever want to do anything bu lurk around here? it's so..... different. ;)

[The Chancer]

Had recently made an enquiry system for company I work for, all OK... and was tidying it up - deleting some old tables in the database I had used for testing.....

I thought I had counted 11.... there were only nine...

So... MSSQL requires delete (do you want to do this ?) then return....

OK delete,return,delete,return,delete,return,delete,return,delete,return,delete,return,delete,return,delete,return,delete,return,delete,return,delete,return

In quick succession....

I see them scrolling up nicely as I had thought, and saw the main enquiry table (about £6,000,000 of business) being deleted.....

Very white indeed... shaking... gonna be fired...

Check backup on machine.... FAILED !!!

MSSQL backup (aka the joke) didn't function...

2 hours later, IT manager walks in, I ask if he has a backup for it, and he backs up the whole network on a daily basis.... only 2 enquiries lost.

I am still here, and noone is none the wiser...

Hotel - "I lost an enquiry"
Me - "Which enquiry ?"
Hotel - "I don't know"
Me - "I can't see it - put it in again"
Hotel - "Oh.. OK"
Me - <sigh> "Where was that bottle in my bottom drawer ???"

[Sxooter]

My favorite d'oh moment was when I rent to reboot my workstation and typed reboot on the console window I had opened on it.

That just happened to be connected to the big production server in the hosting center.

Do you know how long it takes to fsck an 80 gig RAID1? About 10 minutes including boot time before it was back up. It has little things like company phonebook and central authentcation running on it. ugh.

[goldbug]

See, that's why journaled file systems are so nice :)

[Sxooter]

Yeah, but my machines are set to fsck anyway after 30 days. Even journlaed filesystems can develop errors (I've seen it happen on ext3 several times.)

edit:

Of course, the sad thing is, that box had 32 days uptime. Just two days less and it would have just rebooted in a minute and half or so.

[dartcol]

Waking up at 9.30 when I was supposed to be in class at high school at 9am. Oh yes, I was the teacher at the time ... oops.

Other Doh! moment was having spent last Friday rebuilding the dept site I settled down tonight to finish it off. Spent two hours working on the it before I twigged that I hadn't downloaded the fresh version of the site and had been working on the originally inherited version. Pillock? Me? Never!

[clearbreach]

I'll keep my story short:

Bugged my dad to drive me somewhere to take some photos. Drove an hour or more to Lake Simcoe. Ended up forgetting my camera. Drove all the way back and found the camera on the bench by my front door.

D'oh!

[dalecosp]

Many of you heard about my latest doh! in the code contest #1 thread, but if you like, here's a pic...

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by dalecosp
Many of you heard about my latest doh! in the code contest #1 thread, but if you like, here's a pic... OUCH, dalecosp!! Glad to see you are able to keep on typin' though ;)

-Elizabeth

[Bunkermaster]

damn! you're lucky you didn't buy yourself a farm.

[stolzyboy]

dalecosp thats pretty bad

check out my car DOH i did a couple months ago

[dalecosp]

Hurts too much to even think about.

Hopefully, back to some eye doctor tomorrow. The guy who did the eyelid surgery is too dang busy to listen when we tell him that something ain't quite right....

The arm's coming along, I can now type 2 handed again for a little while before fatique sets in (thanks, Elizabeth!)

Stolzyboy, I hope you weren't injured???

[stolzyboy]

Originally posted by dalecosp
Stolzyboy, I hope you weren't injured???

i wasn't injured much at all, just smashed my head into the windshield

my passenger who got the side impact after the front impact got hurt pretty bad (he's ok now), as you can see the passenger door was pushed all the way to the middle of the car

oh...btw, this wasn't my fault thankfully, but the lady that caused the whole thing didn't have insurance, yippy, and i only had liability, so i was out of a car and had no insurance money to buy a new one

i'm always such a lucky guy, LOL

[dalecosp]

Yikes. I only had liability too.

Thankfully, I have had up to 4 cars in the last few months, so we've still got wheels.

Don't they do anything to people w/o liability up there? Down here it's a state requirement....

[BuzzLY]

Then sue her... it's the American way, right?

[stolzyboy]

yeah, they cited her for driving with no insurance, and yes it's required here

and i did sue her, but she doesn't have a pot to piss in, i won a judgement against her for $3500.00, but a judgement means she only has to pay whatever/month to stay out of jail

i have been receiving payments like clockwork on the 15th of every month

oh did i mention


she is paying me $10.00/month, LOL

nice laws we have here

[dalecosp]

Well, that's cool. Maybe you'll have enough to buy a nice bike in 30 years or so...

IDEA: Paint the hulk highway grey, park it at the entrance to the parking lot that hosts the 'Ininsured motorists Convention" and gain a few more checks. You might develop a pretty good income.
:D :D :D

[stolzyboy]

Well, that's cool. Maybe you'll have enough to buy a nice bike in 30 years or so...

yeah, i was going to put what i got from her into savings, but when she started sending this ten dollar crap, i figured that it would take her so long to pay it off, i would probably owe the bank money, or the irs or something

i mean inflation will kill that money i save from her

oh well, at least i can still program :)

good IDEA btw, but i think peeps would get a little pissed if i did something like that, then i'd probably get thrown in jail with Bubba, and i sure as hell wouldn't like that

[dartcol]

Last time I went Doh!?

2 minutes ago. Why oh why is EMPTY next to DROP on PHPMYADMIN? And why oh why haven't I got the brain to export a schema?

Here we go ... again! :rolleyes:

[CraigRoberts]

stapling body parts?
meet dicky...

Dicky: "hey i'm bored. i know, i'll staple my arm"
*Crunch*
Dicky: "hmm... that didn't hurt. i know... i'll take it out and try again"
*Crunch*
Dicky: "nope... no pain... anyone else want to try?"

He did feel pain after we tried zapping the staple with the ignition thing from an electric lighter...

(soz... about 2 pages behind.. but its me first post here :P)

[dalecosp]

Now THAT brings up an interesting question. Is it really a "Doh" moment when you knew what you were doing while you were doing it?

Or was Elizabeth over there distributing stouts all round? Hmm, *that* would explain the "it doesn't hurt" thing....

:D

[dalecosp]

Just spent about 45 minutes hacking away with eregi(), str_replace() and explode() to isolate meta tags from remote URL's.

Then I read T.F.M.... (http://us4.php.net/manual/en/function.get-meta-tags.php)

Doh!

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by dalecosp
Just spent about 45 minutes hacking away with eregi(), str_replace() and explode() to isolate meta tags from remote URL's.

Then I read T.F.M.... (http://us4.php.net/manual/en/function.get-meta-tags.php)

Doh! I would say that classifies as a mini-doh! at least :D

-Elizabeth

[piersk]

Originally posted by dalecosp
Just spent about 45 minutes hacking away with eregi(), str_replace() and explode() to isolate meta tags from remote URL's.

I know this is off-topic, but why would you want to do this?

[Moonglobe]

one would want to do such a thing generally for a search engine. ever wonder how Google get's the keywords and description of a site? i don't believe they use PHP, but getmetatags() would work perfectly for them.

[dalecosp]

Originally posted by Moonglobe
one would want to do such a thing generally for a search engine. ever wonder how Google get's the keywords and description of a site? i don't believe they use PHP, but getmetatags() would work perfectly for them. Got it! Some guy in General Help (or Newbies? hmm..) was asking if anyone new of a PHP spider; he wanted it for his own site, but wanted to parse genuine HTTP output because he used so many includes()...

I decided to take some header code I had picked up recently and mod it to do the task...am I definitely becoming a @#$@#$%^ geek, because I spent all that time absolutely absorbed in it when I've got paying clients with work to do... :)

[Weedpacket]

Originally posted by Moonglobe
one would want to do such a thing generally for a search engine. ever wonder how Google get's the keywords and description of a site? i don't believe they use PHP, but getmetatags() would work perfectly for them. Many search engines ignore meta tags, because of the tendency of some operators to bloat them with keywords in an attempt to get a high score with the search engines. If I recall, there has been a certain amount of wailing and gnashing of teeth because a certain company padded out their pages with (let's face it, utterly useless) wodges of keywords in their meta tags chosen from one of their competitor's web sites - the intention being of course to have a higher score on any key words that might other wise push the competitor up the list.

So quite a few engines only examine the content of a page. I understand some even attempt to look at font sizes and fore- and background colours, in case page writers were just shovelling a big wodge of 1-pt white-on-white text into their index page and download times bedamned.

Google have on top of that a fairly fancy page ranking system (http://www.google.com/intl/xx-klingon/technology/index.html), in which indexed pages are rated by how many highly-ranked pages link to them.

[crosbystillsnas]

i had a hosted server at a big geman company, including php, mysql and things one needs. the database was the heart of my web including tables with prices, requests, bills....
trying -i am doing cd/dvd production- to use gdlib for designing cds online, i found a rusty version (with gif support) full of bugs, not supporting true color images.
i asked the hoster to have an upgrade on this, but they said they are not planning to do so...
i was annoyed after the 4th call, when i decided to quit that server. it was really comfortable to do 'grade down' to a smaller version online:
-> 'click here and your request will be sent'
-> [click]
-> 'thanks...blablabla... your database has been dropped'

yes, i was also wondering why i did not think of that before.
fact is i did not. and fact is, that there was no backup. all dropped and deleted. i was really close to fire myself.

[Weedpacket]

Once upon a time...

When I was more of what I now wish I was when I wished I were what I am...

I was setting up a new machine. All the ceremony: OS install, christening, servers, etc. The DBMS was PostgreSQL. Thing about PostgreSQL was that - to avoid some (hypothetical) exploits, it would refuse to run as root. As it turned out, that was not quite correct. I had it running; it was inserting, updating, and selecting all quite happily. I didn't know that the configuration had been botched (subtle shift to passive voice, there).

A couple of weeks passed. All was quiet. Too quiet. Then, infant mortality saw one of the hard drive's power cables burn out. Not a problem: it had a RAID system, so another drive was already on the case. Everything kept running. But really, we did have to fix the machine. So we did a controlled shutdown, powered the machine off, and did a bit of surgery. Fired the beast back up ... and found all the databases had vanished. Because of the fouled configuration, PostgreSQL had been refusing to write anything to its data files - it had been holding the entire contents of all the databases in core (except for binaries, which were being stored in the filesystem and hence were written to disk, RAIDed, and backed up). But we all know what happens to the contents of core memory when the power is shut off....

[mzanimephp]

I got a letter from my credit card people, but usually I wait until I have the money before even opening those kind of letters. Because they usually are just bills all the time so why not?

So... a few months later, I finally decided to open that letter.

But to my surprise it wasn't a bill at all, it was a $90.00 refund check, because I have paid them too much! But by now, the check was long expired. :mad:

[The Chancer]

Just got back from holidays - 4 weeks of nice cold Australian weather.... to find out that in his great wisdom, our IT Manager had upgraded the server to Win 2K adv, but forgot to copy over the enquiry system and database that was resting on it...

<sigh>

Why didn't he listen when I said "Don't do it until I get back!" ?? Who knows - shame it was the only proper working copy and I hadn't backed it up for about 2 months... D'oh by me and D'oh by him....

Now gets backed up daily to tape and external USB drive.... no reason not to be very cautious now...

[Merve]

Originally posted by Weedpacket
Many search engines ignore meta tags, because of the tendency of some operators to bloat them with keywords in an attempt to get a high score with the search engines. If I recall, there has been a certain amount of wailing and gnashing of teeth because a certain company padded out their pages with (let's face it, utterly useless) wodges of keywords in their meta tags chosen from one of their competitor's web sites - the intention being of course to have a higher score on any key words that might other wise push the competitor up the list.

So quite a few engines only examine the content of a page. I understand some even attempt to look at font sizes and fore- and background colours, in case page writers were just shovelling a big wodge of 1-pt white-on-white text into their index page and download times bedamned.

Google have on top of that a fairly fancy page ranking system (http://www.google.com/intl/xx-klingon/technology/index.html), in which indexed pages are rated by how many highly-ranked pages link to them.

Google is all well and good, but you can't make a computer understand anything. I searched for the words 'freak society' in AltaVista and Kart00 and got my site as the second or third result, but in Google, I went through six pages of results and gave up. I went to another so-called freak society website and all I saw was gross pictures...it makes my website seem normal! (and it's not actually a really good site because it's hosted on a crappy server with PHP 4.1.2 and my web design skills are also quite crappy and it's also under construction and it'll never be finished).

Anyway, I just don't feel like using Google anymore. It's good to find something quickly, but to research a topic in depth, Kart00 is much better (www.kartoo.com).

As for the last time I went 'DOH!' it was when I tripped over an exercise machine and hit my head on a wooden table while trying to search for a ping-pong ball.

[bad76]

This (http://www.phpbuilder.com/board/showthread.php?s=&postid=10429716#post10429716) is my last
time when i said "DOH!"

:(

/me going around whipping me and asking forgiveness :D

[jayant]

I am used to deleting stuff keep the shift key pressed (so it deletes directly and does not go to recycle bin)

you must have guess by know what happened. I did that to my project.
managed to recover most of it, thanks to norton utilities, else it would have had been "mega doh" :p

[dalecosp]

Originally posted by bad76
This (http://www.phpbuilder.com/board/showthread.php?s=&postid=10429716#post10429716) is my last
time when i said "DOH!"

:(

/me going around whipping me and asking forgiveness :D No, NO, il mio buon amico! It was my fault!!! LOL! :D :D

[dartcol]

To understand how much of a doh! this you need to read this thread (http://www.phpbuilder.com/board/showthread.php?s=&threadid=10221873) first.

So...there I was stuck with a blank page in front of me messing about with all kinds of files and puzzling the hell out of poor dalecosp (thanks for staying in there :) ).
I went to this site (http://www.vbulletin.org/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=39482) and followed the advice and hey presto I was back where I had been before. With a brand new Apache server, mysql and php with all the bits in the right place and all the config files and ini files altered.
Up comes Mozilla. To localhost and ... a blank page.
A fleeting thought suddenly occurred to me that I hadn't set up my database for my local CMS ... clouds gathered .... You see two days ago I did a complete format of my C: drive.

Oops!

I had forgotten to back it up before formatting. Doh! Bang head against desk multiple times.
After returning to my senses this then made me consider what I'd actually written in the index.html script.

Erm, wasn't there a header.php there?
Yes.
[I go to header.php.]
Ah! mylinks_connect(); I must have made a function to ... (faltering voice) erm, what's that connect to?
The DB?
What happens if it can't connect to the DB?
[I check script.]
function mylinks_connect() {
$link = @mysql_connect('localhost', 'user', 'pass');
if (!$link)
exit();
if (!mysql_select_db('mylinks'))
exit();
}
Ah! It exits ... considerable banging of my head against the desk and crying on my wife's shoulder ensued.

DOH! BAKA! DOH! BAKA! DOH! BAKA!
:o :o :o :o

Who said I can't see the wood for the trees? Now, what can I use to build a fire with ...

[n00854180t]

If my wife knew anything about PHP she would never let me hear the end of something like that.

[Moonglobe]

Originally posted by dartcol
To understand how much of a doh! this you need to read this thread (http://www.phpbuilder.com/board/showthread.php?s=&threadid=10221873) first.

So...there I was stuck with a blank page in front of me messing about with all kinds of files and puzzling the hell out of poor dalecosp (thanks for staying in there :) ).
I went to this site (http://www.vbulletin.org/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=39482) and followed the advice and hey presto I was back where I had been before. With a brand new Apache server, mysql and php with all the bits in the right place and all the config files and ini files altered.
Up comes Mozilla. To localhost and ... a blank page.
A fleeting thought suddenly occurred to me that I hadn't set up my database for my local CMS ... clouds gathered .... You see two days ago I did a complete format of my C: drive.

Oops!

I had forgotten to back it up before formatting. Doh! Bang head against desk multiple times.
After returning to my senses this then made me consider what I'd actually written in the index.html script.

Erm, wasn't there a header.php there?
Yes.
[I go to header.php.]
Ah! mylinks_connect(); I must have made a function to ... (faltering voice) erm, what's that connect to?
The DB?
What happens if it can't connect to the DB?
[I check script.]
function mylinks_connect() {
$link = @mysql_connect('localhost', 'user', 'pass');
if (!$link)
exit();
if (!mysql_select_db('mylinks'))
exit();
}
Ah! It exits ... considerable banging of my head against the desk and crying on my wife's shoulder ensued.

DOH! BAKA! DOH! BAKA! DOH! BAKA!
:o :o :o :o

Who said I can't see the wood for the trees? Now, what can I use to build a fire with ... dartcol i feel sooooo sorry for you :D

[dalecosp]

Oh no!! At least we know we're not crazy...and that we're all human (for anyone who was curious).

I'll send you a mysqldump file to rebuild your db ... you want the a]fireworks shopping cart, the b] police uniforms or c] my meaningless opinions and technical drivel?

[Moonglobe]

i'd probably take C...........

[LordShryku]

Yeah, I'm with Moonglobe. I'll take C. At least I'm already used to that :D :D

Let's see...last time I went 'Doh!'....about 2 hours ago when I was forced to turn a completely good Red Hat server into a Windows 2003 Server....

[Moonglobe]

Originally posted by LordShryku
Yeah, I'm with Moonglobe. I'll take C. At least I'm already used to that :D :D

Let's see...last time I went 'Doh!'....about 2 hours ago when I was forced to turn a completely good Red Hat server into a Windows 2003 Server.... aaaaaw man. that sucks. just out of curiosity, how is WS2k3? never had to deal with it....

[Weedpacket]

Mmmm.... Police Uniforms .....

/me gets a loofa and a can of whipped cream ready.

[LordShryku]

Dunno. Just installed it. Haven't played with it yet

[OT] Updated PEBoD for ya. A cross between the PEBoD and Buzz's eye twiching :D

[Moonglobe]

no offense man but that is one uuuuugly beaver :D

i think i'll keep my old one ;)

[LordShryku]

Originally posted by Moonglobe
no offense man but that is one uuuuugly beaver :D

i think i'll keep my old one ;)

Ok man....I start worrying when you start judging how pretty your beavers are....

[Moonglobe]

hey i just prefer them nice and pixelated.......



as with all my other images........




lol

[LordShryku]

Not helping your cause dude. Just keep your pixelated pics away from me! :p

[Moonglobe]

The Beaver: Nature's Engineer



ever wonder why i like beavers so much? ;)

[dalecosp]

Originally posted by Weedpacket
Mmmm.... Police Uniforms .....

/me gets a loofa and a can of whipped cream ready. I dunno what they carry 'down under', but up here, that's a "LART and can of pepper spray" (to use geekified terms for 'nightstick' and 'can of mace' --- yeah, probably jalapeno pepper spray... tacos, anyone?)

I imagine Bunker'd back me up, when/if he appears again....

[Weedpacket]

Originally posted by dalecosp
a "LART and can of pepper spray"
Oh, those are real police officers wearing the uniforms?

/me changes his mind and decides against the bucket of soapy frogs.

[GilesGuthrie]

I dropped one of those 18 litre water cannisters that goes in the water fountain once...

I took 40 minutes to find the syntax error in this line of code once as well:
for($i = 0; $i < noofitems, $i++)

Felt like a right muppet when I finally saw it.

[LordShryku]

Originally posted by Moonglobe
just out of curiosity, how is WS2k3? never had to deal with it....
Thought I'd give ya an update. This fresh install on Win2k3. Came in this morning, installed Apache(didn't even have time for PHP yet), it has crashed non-stop since then. "The Win32 Generic host process has encountered a problem and must close now". Then it restarts. Wash, rinse, repeat. Only stays up for about a minute before doing it again. Can I have my Linux back?

[Moonglobe]

Depends, seeing as this doesnt sound like your box......



but then there is always your favourite site! (linuxiso.org) :D

[LordShryku]

No, no, no, this is my favorite site (http://****microsoft.com) :D

[Moonglobe]

totally

[dalecosp]

Well, how saavy is the boss?

Install Gnome or KDE with the fake 95 theme, and write "2003" all over it. Maybe VMware so you can play a game or two.

Then, ssh in once a week and run 'shutdown -r now' to fake the thing rebooting.

And, hit the secretaries petty cash account for something from the bookstore that says "MSCE" or "Windows 2003 Advance Server" and keep it near your desk.

Any decent bofh in training should be able to pull this one off.

</tongue-in-cheek mode> aah, well..... :rolleyes:

[LordShryku]

Once a week? Currently I'm lucky to have it last a couple minutes without this "Win32 Generic Process" blowing up and rebooting it :(

[dalecosp]

Oh, and I forgot:

add these to ~/.login:

alias dir ls -l
alias del rm -i
alias a: mount_msdosfs /dev/fd0 /a
alias "Norton Autoprotect" /bin/kill -9 1

:D :D

[dalecosp]

Originally posted by LordShryku
Once a week? On The LINUX box! The idea is to fake him out ... so, you put linux back on, set up the fake environment, and say "I got it running ... had to change the GUI a bit for better performance... etc., etc."

The once a week thing is known as "Stable" in the windoze world, right?

[LordShryku]

Oh hell. These guys live under Bill Gates' desk. They'd notice. We have very frequent "discussions" about how one OS is better than the other. They're really getting a kick outta this whole "me having to deal with MS" thing.

[dalecosp]

Hmm, "smart NT sysadmins." Yep, you got trouble....

[LordShryku]

Wouldn't go so far as "smart"....... :D

It's a big company though. Big MS contracts. I'm the underdog around here because I use Linux. The Oracle DBA's think I'm a dumb@ss for using MySQL too.

[n00854180t]

Man that sucks Lord. Just find one of them that has pirated software and direct them to the article about Windows containing an NSA key in it LOL(M$ R HAX J00!).

[Merve]

ouch!

[n00854180t]

You guys heard about that right?

[LordShryku]

Actually, that's from a while ago. It's the whole reason that China gets to look at so much source.

[n00854180t]

MS source?

(Yeah was quite a bit ago that I read it)

[LordShryku]

http://slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=03/09/30/057249&mode=thread&tid=109&tid=126&tid=128&tid=172&tid=187

[n00854180t]

MS probably edited it first lol

[LordShryku]

I wouldn't be suprized....

[LordShryku]

Originally posted by LordShryku
Thought I'd give ya an update. This fresh install on Win2k3. Came in this morning, installed Apache(didn't even have time for PHP yet), it has crashed non-stop since then. "The Win32 Generic host process has encountered a problem and must close now". Then it restarts. Wash, rinse, repeat. Only stays up for about a minute before doing it again. Can I have my Linux back?

Just as a follow up to this...

I'm gonna need one of you MS people to explain this to me. Got it to stop crashing.......by installing a Security Update for Internet Explorer. Figured this just couldn't be right. Wanted to see if it would do the same thing on an upgrade instead of a fresh install. So went and upgraded a Win2k Server to Win2k3. Same thing. Crashed about 40 times overnight. Installed the same nonsensical "IE Security Update", stopped crashing.

[n00854180t]

Doesn't make any sense to me Lord. Are there P3 motherboards that can only handle 256mb in each ram slot? (I bought two sticks of 512mb and both of them show as on 256)

I had something similar happening to me Lord. After I installed the second stick of ram last night I kept crashing and it was telling me it was because of a couple of files, one in \WINDOWS\Minidump folder. So I fire up the iBook and search on it, and I go to a page that says how to fix it. It seems to be something with the RAM settings (I had thought it was something I fuxx0red when I put the RAM in (the case on the damn VAIO is so poorly designed...one of the screws for the PSU is covered by the IO panel >_<) because it was such a pain in the bum and I don't have any ESD equipment right now)).

[LordShryku]

It's not a hardware problem. Both of these are well within the limits of the hardware specs.

[dalecosp]

Not an MS guy, per se, but I'll proffer some possibilities.

1. The box is on the Net and being attacked by something that causes spontaneous reboots. MS sends out new code that fixes the issue, and it's called a "security upgrade" because it prevents Denial of Service due to spontaneous rebooting. :rolleyes:

2. MS botches some application code, and includes the fixed version in a "security update," since they have to issue those all the time as people around the world find the issues. :eek:

[dalecosp]

Originally posted by n00854180t
(the case on the damn VAIO is so poorly designed...one of the screws for the PSU is covered by the IO panel >_<) It's a crying shame that me (and my clients) can't afford good cases, either. I'm building 8 machines this week/weekend/Monday<?> (help!!) and the metalwork is just poor, poor, poor..... :rolleyes:

[Merve]

Yeah, I was reading up on Microsuck; it's hilariious!

[LordShryku]

I'll take MS botches #2 for 200 Alex.

Both boxes are secured behind our firewalls on the intranet.

[n00854180t]

Originally posted by LordShryku
It's not a hardware problem. Both of these are well within the limits of the hardware specs.

Hehe I meant mine about the hardware stuff LOL sorry, I was just asking if anyone knew if any p3 mobos only allow 256mb per slot.

Originally posted by dalecosp
It's a crying shame that me (and my clients) can't afford good cases, either. I'm building 8 machines this week/weekend/Monday<?> (help!!) and the metalwork is just poor, poor, poor..... :rolleyes:

That sucks dale, I just wish I had been around when my mother in law had bought the damn thing, I would have talked some sense into her. One more thing I noticed whilst strugging to get some new ram into the comp, it seems the PSU and the proc are connected by some funky @ss funnel thing. Also it is really strange where the proc is at, it's near the back of the board, right under where the PSU is (connected by that funnel piece of plastic). And by no means is this a small case at all. It is pretty big, but it looks so freaking crammed in there.

[dalecosp]

funky <snip> funnel thing...Sounds like some Dell's I've worked on ...

[LordShryku]

I was thinkin the same thing. Most of the Dell (P3's) I've worked on have that funnel from the fan to the processor. Figured it was either good or evil: suck all the dust out. Or blow it all in. Never been a big Dell fan myself.

[bubblenut]

Well, I've just been directed here from another thread and I've not posted in this one so I figured it's time to take to the stage and wow you all with my super-human powers of dumb :D

I made this little mess up a couple of months ago now. I had to search for all references to a particular file through our content management and general maintenance system. Now this isn't just a few Meg. of nicely ordered scripts it's a veritable plethora of one-time-only scripts; a content management system; datafeeds (plus loads of logs) and more. In short it's about 6.7Gb of s**t. This is only important by means of explination as to why I left things chugging away and went to work elsewhere. Can anyone spot anything wrong with the following little BASH script?

for file in $(find .)
do
grep $file "file.php" && echo $file
done > output

Yes, the output file is in the search path so the script eventually gets to searching output and then things just get very messy. About five minutes later we got a call from the customer services dept. that the maintenance system had fallen down and nothing would work. Everytime anyone tried to do anything they were getting some filesystem full error and when I flicked back to the terminal I'd kicked this script off in it was telling me much the same thing. Easily solved and easily recovered from but damn did I feel dumb :p

[bad76]

I've recently
do a site for a client, and it's a month that I'm registering the address, uploading to the host, updating and modifying, optimizing, advertising on local journal...


now, when all is done, in the same time, the host is closed forever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I can say only a word: doh!


And who backup the db after just a month while nobody look it?
double doh!

[bubblenut]

I just done another one :(
Trying to remember how to roll back a file in cvs I did this

cvs update -r 1.1

Can you see what I forgot?
Yes, a file. I just rolled back my entire cvs tree losing all the work I'd done on there today. Luckily I wasn't working in the cvs this morning so it wasn't much but boy do feel a fool.

[dalecosp]

Originally posted by bubblenut
I just done another one :(
Trying to remember how to roll back a file in cvs I did this

cvs update -r 1.1

Can you see what I forgot?
Yes, a file. I just rolled back my entire cvs tree losing all the work I'd done on there today. Luckily I wasn't working in the cvs this morning so it wasn't much but boy do feel a fool. Ooooh ... and I've been thinking about moving the devel && production /www folders into CVS ...

That sounds almost as bad as rm -rf /* ... but maybe not. I guess 'luck' was with you.... :)

[Merve]

I've been going D'oh! for the past two or three days. I fried my Mozilla install trying to get from 1.7.1 to 1.7.2 ... at least 5 times. I finally figured out it was a buggy extension that was causing the problem. It was stupid because I tried the same solution five times without changing a thing and hoping that it would turn out alright. Kinda like going to a movie a third time to see if the ending changed.

[mrgrammar]

I just had a DOH moment this morning. I sent a message to our admins asking why debt2004.com wasn't working. (It's a new domain we just set up on our server.) They sent me a message back saying, "Set up the domain and we'll make sure it works." I checked and had set up debt2000.com instead of the correct domain above. DOH!

I hate making stupid mistakes! lol

[melody]

Had probably the worst d'oh! moment ever a couple of weeks ago. Filled up the tank of my car with petrol and went to pay at the kiosk. Arriving there, I realised i'd forgotten my wallet with my card and my money in. I rooted round for a few minutes scrabbling together change from my pockets whilst the assistant watched me like i was a right old pikey. I didn't have enough money and didn't even have my phone with me to use as a deposit. I had to leave the car keys with the garage and use my change to catch a bus home ( ~6 miles), so I could get my wallet and money.

Safe to say I won't be showing my face in that petrol station again for a while. I'll bet I go down in forecourt folklore for that one.

D'OH!

[Elizabeth]

melody, don't feel bad, I did the same thing a few days ago. Well, almost the same thing, but thankfully I usually pay by credit card at the pump (you pay before pumping that way) and so I was saved the embarassment of your situation. I was able to save face and pull away from the pump unscathed when I realized I didn't have my purse with me. I did, however, have to endure the barrage of questions from my 4 year old.

"Mommy, what are you doing?"
"There's been a change of plans."
"Why didn't we get any gas?"
"I forgot my purse."
"Are we going to go get it?"
"Maybe."
"Well what if we run out of gas before then?"
"We won't."
"But how do you know?"
"Because I have calculated the exact distance we have left on this tank of gas with the mileage converter in my brain."
"Oh."
<pause>
At that moment I realize I had left my purse in the Chinese restaurant where we had eaten the night before.
"Mommy, this isn't how to go home."
"I know, there's been a change of plans...."

[redrabbit]

This is a very funny thread, that just makes you think you are not alone when you think you are :-)

2 days ago, i started a new part-time job in a Jewllery store. This is a really really posh place that sells jewellery from about 500 pounds to 18 thousand pounds.

So i start work, and i'm shown how to work the till systems and shown some other basic stuff. So i sell some customer a watch or something, and swipe her card, and she goes off happy, and im happy that i done it right.

Now, another customer comes up to me, i do the stuff, sell the item, and put the product through the till. I go to swipe her card in the computer and realise i didnt give the previous customer her card back - and that was about 25 minutes ago.

So i start panicking a bit, as its my first day. So i serve the customer, and get really worried, and then i look down and realise i didnt give her card back to her either!!!.

So now, i have two cards, and no customers, as they had left.

Anyway, no one was pissed off at me really, and the two customers did get their cards back that day, so no harm done.

=================== DOH 2 ================

I also lost my keys that they gave me as well. The keys allow access to every cabinet in the shop, so i had access to thousands and thousands of pounds worth of jewllery, and i lost the keys!!!

Well, after a big panick, and trying not to let anyone know, i found them about 30 minutes later.

[Weedpacket]

Harkening back to a post by Piersk about exams, I finally thought I'd post this delightful incident from my varsity days...

At the beginning of the year, Weedpacket had skilfully managed (aided by a pile of coloured building blocks) to put together a class timetable that gave him the entire Wednesday off. He would have preferred Monday, but you can't have everything.

Needless to say, when the midyear tests came up at the end of the semester, one of the more important papers had its test on Wednesday. At 12:30pm, to be precise. I mean, first thing in the afternoon! You can still taste the toothpaste!

In-jokes aside, Weed dutifully made the 45-minute rail journey from home. He decided it would be a good idea to get in somewhat ahead of time and put in a bit of last-minute study in the library beforehand. He called it "studying" - it was really more a matter of generally immersing himself in the subject so that the stuff he knew was a bit closer to conscious recall than it would have been if he had been pondering, say, which movie to go see in the afternoon.

Getting in at around eleven, he noted where the two-hour test was going to be held - in the lab, unsurprisingly - and trotted up the stairs to the library, where he plunked himself down in a comfy chair with a textbook and tried to avoid further in-jokes.

At one point he glanced up and noted that the clock read "3:00PM"; then he went home.

[piersk]

Originally posted by Weedpacket
Harkening back to a post by Piersk about exams, I finally thought I'd post this delightful incident from my varsity days...

Dude, that was like a whole year ago!! Glad to hear I'm not the only one who was dumb enough to miss an exam :rolleyes:

[dalecosp]

Originally posted by Weedpacket
it was really more a matter of generally immersing himself in the subject
<snip>
At one point he glanced up and noted that the clock read "3:00PM"; then he went home. An excellent definition of "immersion", indeed. ;)

[AlexP]

My moment was yesterday. In another post I wrote...

I ****ED MY DAY PEOPLE. HOPEFULLY THE MANAGER DOESN'T FIND WHY I WASTED MY TIME ON A **** LIKE THIS.

THE FILES WERE SAVED AS FILE.PHP.TXT BUT THEY APPEARED AS FILE.PHP ON WINDOWS

****SU
aLEX


The main problem was not that the files were saved as .php.txt but that they appeared as .php in windows, and actually I thought they were .php files but they didn't open normally in browser.

Well I got mad to depressed at a moment and took me 4 hours until i discover the mistake.


It sucked when my manager was trying to find out what I was doing all that time and I couldn't proceed doing more productive work!!!

Alex

[dalecosp]

Well, that's simply a WinDOH!s moment ... and from what I hear, a very large percentage of the world's computer users have that every day....

[redrabbit]

Originally posted by dalecosp
Well, that's simply a WinDOH!s moment

HAHA!

[bubblenut]

My boss just called me over and asked me to check through the main function file as he'd found a couple of anomolies in it over the weekend. Namely that there was a flag set in the main search function to allow all products to be displayed (even if they're not active) and also, there had been a mod made to the event logging function which displayed all errors and notices (along with relevant sql, file paths etc.) to the browser. :queasy: The worst part was there was no way I could deny it was me either, in the event logging funtion I'd also set it to write to logging file ... in *my* home directory. Damn!

I know how all this happened and, in fact, it's kinda stupider than if I'd just not bothered to check the files for differences. I use vimdiff because it highlights everthing nicely and cuts out lines which aren't different. What I didn't appreciate was that vim remembers the cursor position in the file so, after adding a new function to the bottom of the file, when I vimdiff'd them all I saw was the new function added at the bottom. If I'd bothered to press page-up a couple of times I'd have seen a whole different story.

I feel as though I'm becoming the champion of this thread. I know it's not a competition but it is nice to know I exel at something :D

Bubble

[dartcol]

A wise man once said, "Talent comes in many guises." :D

[dalecosp]

There's a box over there on the bench that belongs to a little old lady who only drives it on Sundays ...

Pentium II 400, 64MB SDRAM, Win98SE ... starting to become a real "period" machine, I guess.

Work ticket says "needs additional hard drive and client wants a CD-R". Now, when I looked at this thing, first we noticed Windows complaining about HDD space: She's got about 1.9 GB on this thing, with a 2GB HDD. OK. But when I open the case, the HDD is 6GB. Fdisk finally shows that whatever joker had set it up had only partitioned 1/3 of the disk. [1st Doh! --- someone else!]

So, I've got a crisis. I can partition the extra space *AND* add the new HDD ... then her Windows install will see three hard drives - 2, 4, and 20 GB. But the system is on C:, and unlike 'Nix, symlinking from one partition to another won't always work ... I can move "My Documents", but "Program Files" is going to mess up a few things, like her antivirus, 'because the symlinks aren't active when the machine is booting, apparently. (NAV doesn't like it, anyhow...)

I decide to enlarge the primary DOS partition. Being a freeware advocate, I don't own Partition Magic or that ilk ... I spend a day or two futzing with her machine from time to time, trying to learn GNU's PartEd and then some other freeware thing that looks good...but I'm having little luck.

Finally, last night ... it hits about 2:30 AM, when I'm in bed. Why in the fsck does "msbackup.exe" copy and restore registry files anyway??? :eek: DOH! Backup, repartition to 6 freakin' gigabytes, restore.

Any first year bench tech should know that. I did, in my first year ... seems the geekier I get, the more I try to do things the hard way ...:rolleyes:

To top it all off, it appears I've ordered a 40 GB HDD instead of a 20 to add to this system. Try that with a BIOS circa 1995 .... Doh!

[Weedpacket]

Originally posted by dalecosp
Pentium II 400, 64MB SDRAM, Win98SE ... starting to become a real "period" machine, I guess. I've got a Pentium MMX 166 here I've been cajoled into installing Mandrake 10 onto over the weekend. Let's see if I have something to report here by Sunday evening :eek:.

To top it all off, it appears I've ordered a 40 GB HDD instead of a 20 to add to this system. Try that with a BIOS circa 1995 .... Doh!So partition it to 20GB and claim "it was like that when I found it" if someone notices :D

[Weedpacket]

I knew something would happen.

The install itself went smoother than I expected; the installer recognised my hardware better than Windows ever did. But I had to get there first.

The warning came when I began setting up the bits to put everything together (I'd been given the components). I stared for about fifteen seconds before realising that a power cord had not been supplied.

Okay, another power cord in the interim.

Quick reconfigure to the BIOS to boot from CD first rather than the hard drive.

Talking of hard drives. I also had a 6.4GB hdd to put in. Easy as: whip out the leatherman, unscrew the case, expose the chassis, slide the drive in, plug in the data cable.

Fire the puppy up.

No master disk found.
No slave disk found.

Shoot the puppy down.

Unplug the hard drive. examine the jumper settings. Yup: primary master. Let's try slave for the sake of argument

No master disk found.
No slave disk found.

Uh-huh. The jumper looks a bit worn - maybe that's it. Get ahold of a paperclip and consider soldering up a substitute jumper.

Scratch the idea as the soldering iron is out of butane.

Look at the hard drive. Look at the jumper. Set the jumper to primary master. Slide the drive into the bay. Plug the data cable into the drive. Plug the power cable into the drive. Fire the puppy up.

Installation proceeds without a hitch.

Thermodynamics and I are currently not on speaking terms.

[dalecosp]

Originally posted by Weedpacket
I knew something would happen.
<<snip>>
whip out the leatherman,

Ahh, great tool, that. Some days it'd just be nice if it had a hammer on it, though. :rolleyes:

Chopping into the power cable w/o *thick* gloves is a much more dangerous way to vent .....

[dalecosp]

SysAdmin DOH! ...

Thursday I was at one of my well-established, larger client's shops. I needed a little more work to make up the last half hour I knew I'd be billing them, so I began adjusting the firewall rules to do "Egress" filtering, as I'd never done that when I set them up in the first place. I set up rules and tested functionality on a LAN machine. I even called the United Parcel Service and talked to Level 2 tech support, to make *sure* I'd not screw up their UPS shipping software. Everything seems cool (I can browse, get DNS, send/receive email), so I left.

Friday afternoon I'm 20 miles on the backside of nowhere, installing "bluepipe" conduit amongst the roof trusses in the shell of a new building. My cell phone rings, and its a partner in the above firm. "Why can't I buy stuff online?" :(

:eek: Finish bluepipe, drive to office, ssh in, and:

/sbin/ipfw allow ip from any 443 to 192.168.1/24 via vr0Doh! As if the internet was one way transportation... :rolleyes:

[The Chancer]

Last Week...

New machine build - all parts assembled - using old 80Gb data drive from previous machine (was Secondary Master - now to be Secondary Slave...)

All in - jumpers positioned (from memory... won't do that again...) everything works...

Assign drive letters - all OK...

Check data on all drives.... no data on old drive WTF /????? Only 32Gb drive ??? WTF ???? (cold sweat, pacing madly...)

Power down....

Check everything... look again at jumpers, and read the top of the drive...

To limit this drive to 32Gb max, do this... |:|: Secondary drive jumper settings - do this.... ||::

So... change it all over, power it all back up... everything there - all OK - underwear changed....


Today...

Decided to write a script to delete all files and folders withing a selected directory tree - only testing but what the hell...

It works.... a little too well - closed the text editor down, and ran the app.

What happened - it deleted the only copy of the file I had, along with everything else....

D'Oh.....

[dalecosp]

Originally posted by The Chancer
Today...

Decided to write a script to delete all files and folders withing a selected directory tree - only testing but what the hell...

It works.... a little too well - closed the text editor down, and ran the app.

What happened - it deleted the only copy of the file I had, along with everything else....

D'Oh..... I wish I had half a million bucks for every time I've done this. I'd be at least a millionaire. Now I either hard code the path into the script and run it from some other location, or:if ($file != $_SERVER['SCRIPT_FILENAME']) {
do_something();
}Certainly does make ya feel stupid at the time ... :o

[Weedpacket]

Hee, the old "let's delete EVERYTHING!!!" bug!

I do remember one memorable occasion when I caught myself doing this (it was even worse, though, it was "let's truncate every file to ZERO BYTES!").

Even as I began to realise what was happening, I went to another terminal window and marked all of the threatened files as Read Only. Crisis averted before conscious thought caught up with the situation with a loss of six files out of over three hundred.

So there's hope for us all yet.

[davidjam]

I suddenly feel talkitive. It must be all these "herb" teas I'm drinking.

So, yesterday, I went through the process of decocting a brew of willow bark and peppermint. I was in a rush to get back to work. It took 15 minutes for the tea to finish.

Next, I take the pan off the stove, go over to the sink and pour the tea down the drain...

I really don't know why.

[bubblenut]

Originally posted by davidjam
I suddenly feel talkitive. It must be all these "herb" teas I'm drinking.

So, yesterday, I went through the process of decocting a brew of willow bark and peppermint. I was in a rush to get back to work. It took 15 minutes for the tea to finish.

Next, I take the pan off the stove, go over to the sink and pour the tea down the drain...

I really don't know why.

ROFL, that's brilliant :D

Not least becauase I know exactly what you mean. I regularly stop half way through doing something utterly bizarre and think "What on *earth* am I doing?"

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by bubblenut
I regularly stop half way through doing something utterly bizarre and think "What on *earth* am I doing?" At least you're aware you're doing it- yesterday my husband asks me why the frozen chicken was in the pantry... I of course have no recollection of the incident, so I immediately blame the kids. His response: "nice try, it was on the top shelf." Apparently the sane half of my brain had blocked out the act entirely. :D

[Weedpacket]

Getting out of the car, locking the door, swinging the door to shut it. Looking through the window at the steering column, seeing the keys still in the ignition. Continue shutting the door anyway....

Curse central locking.

[dalecosp]

Originally posted by Weedpacket
Getting out of the car, locking the door, swinging the door to shut it. Looking through the window at the steering column, seeing the keys still in the ignition. Continue shutting the door anyway....

Curse central locking. Hmm, they can set up logic circuits that will *not* lock the door if the engine is running. They can set up logic circuits that ring a bell if your keys are in the ignition lock and the door is open.

Why can't/don't they logic the two together? So Elizabeth doesn't have to pull the keys out of the ignition to lock out stalking geeks, I guess? Hmm...

[dalecosp]

Sorry to resurrect it if it's so dead that it stinks ...

1. Infected WinXP box --- boot "Safe Mode CMD prompt only" Note lots of silly executables, including mlor.exe elor.exe, etc.

2.del *lor*exe

3. Attempt to start the GUI....

One of those mornings....:rolleyes:

[Sxooter]

Originally posted by dalecosp
Hmm, they can set up logic circuits that will *not* lock the door if the engine is running. They can set up logic circuits that ring a bell if your keys are in the ignition lock and the door is open.

Why can't/don't they logic the two together? So Elizabeth doesn't have to pull the keys out of the ignition to lock out stalking geeks, I guess? Hmm...

My Toyota Camry has a pretty intuitive (but strange at first) locking algo in it's key / lock circuitry.

If you lock the doors with the key in the ignitiion, it unlocks them IF the driver's door is open. Otherwise they stay locked.

If you open the drivers door, and, with no keys in the lock, lock the door, THEN put the keys in the ignition, it unlocks the doors WHEN the driver's door shuts.

It's kinda funny to try and convince the system to lock your keys in the car (with a spare set at hand just in case you succeed.)

Basically, you can't do it from the driver's door. And it's not related to whether or not the engine is running.

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by Sxooter
My Toyota Camry has a pretty intuitive (but strange at first) locking algo in it's key / lock circuitry.

If you lock the doors with the key in the ignitiion, it unlocks them IF the driver's door is open. Otherwise they stay locked.

If you open the drivers door, and, with no keys in the lock, lock the door, THEN put the keys in the ignition, it unlocks the doors WHEN the driver's door shuts.

It's kinda funny to try and convince the system to lock your keys in the car (with a spare set at hand just in case you succeed.)

Basically, you can't do it from the driver's door. And it's not related to whether or not the engine is running. Sxooter, it's obvious you've spent quite a bit of time on this one... maybe it's time for a new hobby :D

[dalecosp]

Originally posted by Elizabeth
Sxooter, it's obvious you've spent quite a bit of time on this one... maybe it's time for a new hobby :D He probably was the programmer; his hobby is correcting glaring logic errors in the db forum, and keeping us EL'ers on the toes, perhaps...

:D

[Weedpacket]

Until I had it explained to me that it was for preventing carjackings, I couldn't understand why the car's doors would lock when the car was moving. I had this mental image of a suicide epidemic sweeping Japan where people had an uncontrollable urge to jump out of moving cars.

[bpat1434]

This isn't really a Doh! moment, more of a:
aww sh!t!! F*C|<!!

I got reports from many visitors to a site that they couldn't access it. After seeing there was nothing wrong, I decided to go page by page to see if there were any issues with small parts of the site, and not the site in general.

Much to my surprise, I visited the photos section (which I coded by hand) and got a page that had:
"H4X0R3D" on it. Nothing else. Aww SH!T!! That wasn't the end. I then lost connection to my servers, cuz my ISP sucks. F*C|<!!.

But I soon learned that the pre-pubescent teenager just added about 7 rows to a database that added javascript to the page that made it display what he wanted. I'm glad that he got his rocks off while adding rows to a database. It would have been 100 times worse had he actually destroyed my database and information in there.

Ah well, I fixed the problem (thank you RegEx) and am moving on. I'm sure I'll have more.

~Brett

[dalecosp]

You may have to be 'Nix literate to get this, but ...

So, I've recently started switching everyone's servers to some kind of dual disk setup. For really important people, maybe, RAID (I've not that many RIP), and for others, just a slave disk that we copy the master to every night (and databases every few hours).

So, Wednesday I went down to one location that needed this done, took the box down (less than 10 minutes ... not bad for non-hot-swap hardware, *in a rack*), and put in the spare drive. Boots up and all's well.

On my way out I notice the application (other) server is sitting on the "pedestal" in front of the rack, leaning over at a 20-30 degree angle 'cause the bolts are under one side of the case (it's not rack mount).

I figure, "that's a hazard". _Ever so freakin' carefully_ I gently slide the machine off the front pedestal and around to the back of the rack where there is lots of room on a level surface. I've got my eyes on that NIC like a hawk, making sure that the lights stay on --- no power cable issues, no net disconnect, etc.

About the time it's *almost* in place, someone comes around the corner ... "are we down?"

Doh!

Anyway, dad gummed thing wouldn't reconnect the NIC without a reboot ... and the blasted light was on the whole time! And, of course, customers at the front counter with wallets in hand....

Of course, that's not the real Doh ... moment (knew that was comin' didn't ya?)

So, I go home, shell into the web/PHP/mail/DNS server, and set up my partitions and newfs the drive. It's mounted at /1 /2 /3, mirrors of / /var and /usr.

I create my ultimo backup script:#!/bin/sh
/sbin/dump -0 -a -L -f - / | ( cd /1 ; /sbin/restore -ruvf - )
/sbin/dump -0 -a -L -f - /var | ( cd /2 ; /sbin/restore -ruvf - )
/sbin/dump -0 -a -L -f - /usr | ( cd /3 ; /sbin/restore -ruvf - )
and add it to root's crontab:20 3 * * * /bin/sh /home/me/scripts/cloneNow, if you're pretty used to 'Nix, you see the problem already (to make it twice as bad, root's mail is aliased to both me and my secretary, here in the office in the sticks....)

If you're not into 'Nix, I guess I'll explain. In the 'restore' command, you'll see a "v" option ("verbose"). Now, cron sends you an email with the output of whatever work it does. And this server had some extra goodies, like the entire FreeBSD CVS tree and a directory from "make release", that restore had to tell me about, since it was called with "v".

So, for the past two days fetchmail's been working it's tail off the live long day, MUA's have been crashing, and I've been cursing the ISP (not to them, fortunately :rolleyes: ) while our systems downloaded two emails of > 400K lines each.

I think I'll take that "v" off of there.....

[bubblenut]

Ouch, that's got to hurt. I had a kinda simmilar DOH! moment in the office not long ago. Well, it's only similar in that it involved the system sending loads of emails. We have a rather bloated source tree where I am (over 7000 files for the main site). My boss decided it would be a nice idea to test out CVS's change notification feature on it. The only problem being that the watch he set up also watched for cvs edits and virtually everyone in the office does a "cvs update" and then a "cvs edit" in the root directory of their checkout every morning to make sure they're up to date. I'm sure you can see where this is heading. The next day the dev box tried to send over 7000 emails to both me and my boss for each developer and designer on the team. That's 4 developers and 5 designers and one hell of a lot of emails. Needless to say, it was a slow morning.