Who bears the brunt of programmer jokes?

[dalecosp]

... I'm sure there are myriad traditions; much as in various cultures we have the occasionally sad but usually good natured habit of "teasing" some group as the brunt of jokes ... it used to be various ethnic peoples, then it was "blonde" jokes, etc....

So, who is the programmer's target? I mean, like (warning: golden oldies....):Q: What's five yards long with an IQ of 500?
A: Fifty Perl programmers in the unemployment line....*or* :Did you hear about the ASP programmer who won an Olympic gold medal? He took it home and had it bronzed....

[weekender]

my vote - fortran proggies

but there should be a category for "people who use the word 'elucidate'"...

[piersk]

Definately not ASP programmers, especially since I (and goldbug IIRC) both work with this language.

[Steveo31]

Hehe... where can I find more of these jokes?

[dalecosp]

Why, SteveO, make 'em up yourself....Q: What do they call a dance attended by a bunch of INTERCAL programmers?

A: A goof ball....

Q: Why does a FORTRAN programmer need two hands to eat a bowl of soup?

A: He has to hold one hand under the fork to catch the drops........ c'mon, now ... aren't they simply awful? :D

[Moonglobe]

INTERCAL programmers should be revered, not demeaned. and i say python programmers, 'cause theyir language's named after a snake:P

[dalecosp]

OK ... thanks for "elucidating" :)
Did you hear about the Python programmer who locked his keys in his Volvo?

It took two hours to get his girlfriend out....

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by piersk
I (and goldbug IIRC) both work with this language. ... which is precisely why I voted for ASP, ha ha.

[bad76]

There are 4 programmers. One in PHP,
one in PASCAL, one in C, one in JAVA.

The PHP guy ask this...
"I do this, but don't work!

function greets()
{
echo $pippo;
}

$pippo="Hello world";
greets();

What is wrong? "

The PASCAL guy answer: "Just one error: keep out the ';' after echo instruction..."
The C guy answer: "Just one error: you are missing the void before function..."
The JAVA guy answer: "I look about 1000 errors... you need to make a class, then inherit it, while do this, you have to... bla, bla, bla,bla..."


...and get a look to the picture for another kind of joke...

:D :D :D

[Weedpacket]

Originally posted by Elizabeth
... which is precisely why I voted for ASP, ha ha. But with posts like this (http://www.phpbuilder.com/board/showthread.php?s=&threadid=10271071) do we need to tell jokes about ASP/VBScript programmers?

[piersk]

Originally posted by Weedpacket
But with posts like this (http://www.phpbuilder.com/board/showthread.php?s=&threadid=10271071) do we need to tell jokes about ASP/VBScript programmers?

Yeah, I spose...

[goldbug]

How come this wasn't an option....

USERS!!

[piersk]

Don't you mean

Originally posted by goldbug
LUSERS!!

???

[Merve]

Pascal programmers deserve to be made fun of :D

[dalecosp]

Originally posted by goldbug
How come this wasn't an option....

USERS!! There is no need to *make up* jokes about users; just tell the honest-to-God truth....

;)

[Elizabeth]

Originally posted by bad76
...and get a look to the picture for another kind of joke...

:D :D :D Thanks for the chuckle, bad76! :D

[dalecosp]

Very nice stuff, bad76! :)

I know a LISP programmer who's so boring that at parties, he stays in the cloak room.

Sometimes the coats even leave....

[dalecosp]

OK, this one's not bad ...old maybe, but not bad....Funny C declarations!
---------------------
auto accident;
register voters;
static electricity;
struct by_lightning;
void *where_prohibited;
char broiled;
short circuit;
short changed;
long johns;
unsigned long letter;
double entendre;
double trouble;
double glazing;
union organizer;
union pacific, railroad;
float valve;
short pants;
union station;
void check;
unsigned check;
struct dumb by[sizeof (member)];

/*if GCC extensions are allowed */

long long ago; /* in a galaxy far far away */

[Weedpacket]

Some of those have been reported (http://c2.com/cgi/wiki?ProgrammingPuns) in the wild, along with other oddities. It seems programmers can be just as much suckers for puns as anyone else. If not moreso.

[prinzcy]

judging from where i work now, it definitely have to COBOL programmer!!!!